Kiss of Death

I was thinking about death and dying today. I don't especially know why. No one, I know, has died recently. This thought was spurred by my printer (his name is Buford). Buford, and I am not making this up, is a product of the late 1980s or early 1990s. He weighs 86.3 lbs (no joke) and takes a hand truck to move. With all of that mass you would think that the print quality would be sensational. However, I think a drunk spastic monkey with no actual "appendages" or "functioning" brain could produce better work in a much shorter period of time. Apparently he has decided he despises me and for two days has refused to produce anything unless it is a mangled page covered in black dusty toner which goes everywhere. Yes, I do spend too much time alone grading papers and Yes I do talk to my printer. You know that scene in Office Space where they kidnap the printer? IT'S ON SMALLS! THE SMACKDOWN COMETH!

A contributing factor was my lunch time (12 min. today but that is the nature of the job). I arrived home to find that Zoe (my Jedi in training) had unleashed all of her 6 lb. fury upon one of the house plants. I think it was a trying battle but eventually the houseplant caved and sacrificed its life for...well...nothing. I guess not all was a loss. I did laugh to see a huge shredded leaf stuck to Zoe's bearded face. She's the cutest little bearded thing.